I often see, around the middle of May, an argument of sorts unfolding. It surrounds the celebration of Mother’s Day, and the appropriateness of the designation of a day exclusively to celebrate and appreciate everything about our mothers and our relationships with them from our first days throughout our lifetimes.
One side of this discussion is that a special day can make these most special people in our lives feel appreciated and seen in a way most of us don’t always prioritize throughout the rest of the year. The other says that this is nothing but a merchandising gimmick for florists, restaurateurs and greeting card publishers, and moreover we ought to be celebrating our mothers every single day of our lives.
To me, the truth is that both of these perspectives are right; but neither sees the bigger picture. Yes, those who market the ‘essential’ trappings of the day have created a lucrative opportunity; and yes, it is incumbent on each of us to demonstrate our love, honor and appreciation for our mothers (both of our parents, actually) every single day; None of us is so simple and incapable, so without agency that we can’t hold both of these truths at the same time. Our moms are eminently worth celebrating every day, and also deserve a day specifically for them.
As we approach the period after Pesach of the “Yoms”, (Yom Hashoah VeHagvura, Holocaust and Heroism Remembrance Day; Yom Hazikaron, Israel’s Day of Remembrance for Fallen Soldiers and Victims of Terror; Yom Haatzmaut, Israel Independence Day; and several weeks later Yom Yerushalayim, Jerusalem Liberation and Reunification Day) I feel some of the same considerations apply.
On one side, these are unique days, recognizing in particularly Jewish and Zionist ways several of the most impactful events in our recent history. These events have indelibly changed the manner in which Jews encounter the modern world, if not in themselves reflected some elements of the prophetic messages of Jeremiah, Ezekiel and others. It is thus appropriate to designate days on which we either celebrate or commemorate, associating both prayer and reflection with them.
On the other hand, as we can see simply by looking around us and considering what the Jewish people have lived through in the last 150 years (or, in a narrower sense,what we have lived through in the last 3 years), every day is an encounter with history. Every week brings challenges and triumphs. (Every report from Israel brings news of missiles falling, injury and damage, while they also bring news of the decimation of those who rise up to destroy us). Every month brings trauma and renewal. Every year brings encounters with death and destruction, but also hope and resilience. So these “Yoms” could be considered a superfluous repetition of something on our minds and in our hearts every day, every time we listen to Hatikva, or every time we hear Yizkor.
Both of these perspectives are true, and perhaps now more true than ever. We are invested in our Jewish identity first and foremost through the covenant of Abraham, then through the promise to Jacob/Israel, and the experience of Sinai. But we are also the product of a thousand years of sovereignty in our land with our temples, and two thousand years of dispersion, yearning, and persecution, culminating in the singular experiences of our grandparents, parents, and our generations. So as we continue the timeless cadence of Shabbat and holidays, of life cycle events and observances, of renewal in our land and renewal of our spirit, we have encountered history on our own terms and with meaning that can best be crystallized in “Yoms” such as these where we can gather and be strengthened together.
Join us for these important events as we celebrate and observe these “Yoms” in our community: